Jay and two bits of luggage #8 – We’re not selling Jesus

Helsinki, Finland

That’s the second time in a month I’ve crossed Helsinki’s borders! I obviously need to vary my destinations. Nah, I had to be here for an operation: a bit of surgery that’s been two years in the making.

Coming here was hard. Not just because I can’t fit into an airplane-seat, but simply being in the country brings out a slight melancholy in me. Albeit everyone was glad to see me, and for once I felt welcome at my parents’ house.. Finland just doesn’t feel like home anymore.

I’m just a visitor now.

My life is elsewhere.

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Venice, Marco Polo International Airport

I got to chatting with this American soldier dude, after he forced a receipt on me that I left at the coffee shop. “You need to keep this, man!” I had heard this several times during my two week stay, so I finally asked him why. Why bother with these useless bits of paper?

“You might get fined by the finance police!”

“Haha yeah right. .. Wait. You’re serious?”

Apparently Italy has some sort of police force that could and will check if you actually bought what you carry out of the store. In short, this means they’re actually using the consumer as leverage to force the business owner to pay taxes.

I can see a Berlusconi-type twisted politician drooling over this concept as clever and practical.

.. which means the regular citizen will find it a bunch of fascist bullshit. Expect to see it implemented in Finland when they figure it out.

Anyway. I escaped the country without getting caught by the FINANCE POLICE.

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Good fucking riddance.

Maribor, Slovenia

Helsinki was pretty much as expected, although I would’ve liked to stay one more night. My original plan was to hurry back to Italy to get back to the workaway family, but now with that cancelled, there was no hurry. Which meant my time with a girl I’m quite fond of was limited to a mere couple of hours for no good reason. It was.. frustrating. Snuggling was interrupted.

Surgery went without complications, which was nice. No complicated aftermath with bullshit logistics needed. Only issue is my hand luggage, which I packed full of sanitary towels to use as bandages for the open wound in my crotch. As usual, they wanted to open the suitcase at Helsinki Vantaa airport. The customs lady didn’t even raise an eyebrow. I guess they’re used to seeing strange things in people’s carry-on.

Anyway, after a few episodes of Fast&Loud, and a ride in a tricked Audi owned by a friendly gearhead, I’m finally in Maribor, Slovenia. With a working internet connection. Finally. Maybe I can get some fucking work done for a change.

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Yup, this’ll be my home for the next few months. It’ll give me a chance to catch up with my blog-business, and to chat up some local girls! It’s funny how everything turns stagnant and colourless without a constant female-spark.. Too bad my walking speed is somewhat limited right now by my crotchety condition, so it’s a penguin-type speedwalk all the way if I’m to catch a woman on the street!

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As housekeeping news, I switched hosts over to wordpress.com. Blogger.com had a crap interface, horrible looking themery, Google’s weirdly intrusive terms and conditions, and an overall dated image. I just installed WordPress onto my business blog, so this was as good a time as any. All the previous posts are available here.

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